Wet Wednesday/Half-Naked Thursday

Typical. I come back after being away just to fill your minds with smut. Well, let's get on with it then.

I had recommended Usher's "Trading Places" video for the hotness factor, and two years later, I have a replacement. Or at least, an addition to the queue.

Trey Songz's video for "I Invented Sex" is, simply put, a whole lotta WIN. It makes me want to do bad, bad things. That's why I like it. Enjoy.



FYI: My 21st birthday is finally around the corner! On which I will be doing...nothing. I have to work. So at least I'll be at a basketball game, which, truth be told, is what I'd have wanted to do anyway. The chances of that happening, since none of my friends like basketball, would have been slim to none, but alas, dreams do come true.

Backstage Escapades

Hey kids.

I finally have a new comp, but I've been busy as hell so my updates still might be few and far between. Don't abandon me. I feel like good stuff is right around the corner and you won't want to have to jump back and re-read little tidbits when the juicy stuff starts, right? Right.

Note: I feel like my words are boring already! I haven't written in awhile so bear with me.

I started my internship with NBA team, and it's...different than the WNBA, that's for sure. Besides the players being men, I mean. Everything's a little more high-paced, a little more secure, a little more intense. But the food is better.

There is another intern, we'll call him Que (because he is one). We get along pretty well, sometimes he's a little slooooooww-moving for my taste but he's cool.

Know what I look forward to, nay, relish? GROUPIES. Yes, the stuff Billie Jeans are made of! The team had a fan event today, actually, open to the public, and yes, there were a few in the bunch. This one girl had her boobs out distracting everyone from her fug face and a long weave; I noticed her quietly flirting with one of the guys. I saw them out of my peripheral vision, and my gossip radar kicked into high gear, honey. She was spittin' game and he was reciprocating, and yes, contact info was exchanged. This woman wrote down her contact info for everything: I'm talking address, email, phone numbers...I witnessed a proverbial groupie exchange with mine own four eyes. Now, I'm sure the players don't follow through on every number that they get, but still. These people are thirsty, Lord.

You know what I did the first chance I got. Scampered over to Que and spilled all the tea.*

*Tea: Noun. Means gossip, news, or current situation (Girl, what's your tea? or I got some tea you won't believe!)

This all leads me to another point (y'all know I have an issue about everything). I don't condone desperation or outright gold-digging, and a lot of the time I can't believe players fall for this stuff (well, they're just looking for a good time. It's the girls who want more). But still, watching players or guys in general fall over these pretty yet fake women eventually takes a toll on the old ego. Not saying I expected anything (I'm in this business because I like sports, not because I'm looking for a husband, obvs) but it's just...weird...like you're invisible. I can't explain it without sounding like I want something from these guys, but...hmm...those girls make regular girls like me look frumpy and fug. There, I said it.

I HAVE ISSUES I KNOW. They don't cover this in the internship handbook because it's so taboo and I don't want to ask because players' "love lives" are unspoken and very few peoples' business. Plus, most of the workers are middle-aged white men. I'd like to find someone, a young attractive black female who works in sports. I have questions.

All that aside, though, this is a great gig. Fun, and Que and I have become adept at finagling free stuff. It's an art.

Fall is Here!

I love me some autumn. My birthday is in November, along with homecoming, trips to the cider mill, changing leaves, and best of all, the following:

Naps-nothing better than coming in from the cold, bundling up in sweatpants and furry socks, fixing a snacky-snack, and falling asleep in front of the TV, mid-afternoon. Absolutely nothing. The fact that I'm super-busy come fall and rarely have time to do this make it even sweeter.

Sports-Playoff baseball is actually the only kind I watch (Go Dodgers), but the NBA is my first love. Followed by college football, que claro. After around Halloween, there's pretty much always a game of either persuasion. And if I wake up kinda late, and I can just turn on the TV and let the lull of the Florida Gators or LA Lakers rouse my into consciousness. Like watching by osmosis.

Fall fashion-Ugg boots! Peacoats! Scarves! Flannel shirts! Layers of lovely clothes make me happy and keep me nice and toasty. Yummm and hot chocolate.

TV shows-a lot of my fall happiness rests on what's on TV, it seems. Alls I know is that the return of Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, the Office and One Tree Hill (if it stops being dumb) equals a whole lotta WIN.

Cuddling-what better way to watch aforementioned TV and ward off said cold than with some good old fashioned body heat? It is a fact that men are warmer because they have more muscle mass which raises body temperature. I'm just trying to cut down on my heat bill, is all I'm saying.

Plus, fall backwards--more sleep! Amen.

Spotted

Speak of the fineness and he doth appear.

Walking to class and him and his brother were walking on the other side of the grass median. He was just strolling around, being beautiful.

So what did I say? Um, that would be nothing. Unless fidgeting with my sleeve and flipping my hair counts as speech. Secretly I don't think he actually noticed me--he was also messing with his phone.

Maybe if it had been just him I would have said something (no idea what!) But yeah. Just to give you an idea of the psychoses I'm dealing with when it comes to him/cute boys in general. Not pretty. Eek I'm embarrassing myself! Le sigh despite not having any interaction though, I can't complain...but not for long I'm gonna have to move my arse soon...

Jacked

For ONCE, it's not my fault. I have, for ONCE, a good reason not to blog. If there was ever a time to use the "this can't be life" tag, this would be it.

I was robbed. Um, twice.

The first time, someone kicked open my door and stole just about everything a) valuable, 2) sentimental, 3) that makes my life convenient and manageable. These things include Blackberry Curve (the second one I've lost for those counting at home), my LAPTOP, car keys, purse (the 2nd best knockoff I ownded) wallet, backpack (I had to buy a new Spanish book) and downstairs stuff.

They left my TV and DVD player, though.

And get this, this past weekend, someone broke into Cali Girl's trunk while we were at a club and stole our purses. Including the purple bag my mom bought me from NYC (Chinatown--the best knockoff I owned) and my new debit card and spare car key that I'd just gotten--to replace THE ONES STOLEN THE FIRST FUCKING TIME AROUND.

This shit is for the birds. I'm okay, I guess, past being scared and onto irritated. Because who gets robbed twice? Oh, yeah, the first time, I was in the house, sleeping way late, while degenerate asshole burglars cleaned me out. Basically, a something (work with me here) told me to stay under the covers, perfectly still. Yes, I think it was my instinct/gut/God trying to save my arse from something worse than losing all my stuff.

Let's not talk about it. Although I have to say what pisses me off way more than I thought was that my makeup bag was in my bag. Not only do you want my money but you want me to look busted in the process? The nerve.

When I get a new comp I shall update yall more about the happier stuff, like my new internship with an NBA team, my cousin's wedding, and my current crush. Stay tuned for that last one. I need all forces at the ready 'cause he is, to put it mildly, A VISION. A spectacle of football player, big-noseosity, and LUST.

Begging for Forgiveness and Groveling for Advice

Would you rather have bad, boring sex, or none at all? Because my life has been SO, SO dull as of late that I often find it pointless to come here and regale you with my tales of going to class, going to Paper meetings, and going home. But if not posting often enough like I've been doing means that y'all will hate me forever and ever then I will surely come up with the bloggerly equivalent of groveling to keep ya around. So like I said, would you rather have boring sex or none at all? Pretend that I am sex. Huzzah.

Update: ok ok there is a boy that I have a gi-HUGE-ant crush on but I've only seen him twice in person and a million times through Facebook stalking like when he's on the sidelines at football games (in his football uniform, not like cheerleading. Don't play me.) and I happen to be on the track covering the game for the Paper. But he is a vision. Trust me. So what do I do? Lurk around campus, hoping to see him? Then what? I know it's real stank of me to be away for so long and then pump you with advice when I come back but I am desperate and you all are kind and well-versed in seduction. And don't turn into mush when you see a beautiful boy. So help me. Plus, if by some miracle we start something I will have PLENTY of dating shenanigans to document on this here blog! So everybody wins.

My Reputation Preceeds Me

On the phone with an interview subject:

Him: "I look forward to meeting you."

Me: "Um, we've already met. I'm a friend of Top Chef's.

Him: "Oh, wait, I know you, the girl with the glasses!"

Warms my heart. That's my favorite description of myself, by the way. Hence the title!